Perhaps being born and raised in Hawaii has had something to do with my tendency towards procrastination. Kama'ainas have a reputation for being in their own time zone - "Hawaiian Time." Growing up in Hilo, on the "Big Island" was very laid-back and fun. Hilo is the second largest city in the state of Hawaii (although some people - like my wife Dini - consider it a big "country-hick town"). We had all the conveniences of a big city...not! (By the way, I think the term "not" originated in Hilo over thirty years ago.) Anyway, contrary to popular belief, we did have trafffic lights, a couple single screen movie theaters, a bowling alley, and much more. Hilo is noted for Atebara Potato Chips, Locomoco, Plate Lunches, Anthuriums (from Mountain View), Hilo Hattie, and lots of "liquid sunshine."
Hawaii is filled with diversity and is multi-cultural; a "melting pot." However, Japanese-Americans were the majority, especially in Hilo. Racial prejudice was something I only saw on television. That was my perspective at the time, at least. All of my friends were Japanese or Chinese, as well as most of the people that were my role models: parents, teachers, and community leaders.
In the summer of 1965, my father took advantage of an opportunity to enroll in some graduate studies (sponsored by his employer, the State of Hawaii Agriculture Agency) at the University of Florida, in Gainesville. My parents, two brothers, and I took off on a one-year experience that would give me a new outlook on prejudice. I found myself in a new school, a lowly 7th grader, forced to wear shoes to school for the first time, and the only "oriental" in the entire school. Talk about shock - I never felt so uncomfortable in my life. In the morning, students were in very distinct groups. Blacks were gathered in one area, and Whites in another. I could not figure out where I "belonged." I think it helped when students found out I was from Hawaii because it confused them. They assumed that I had to be Polynesian, since I was from Hawaii. They were amazed that I could speak English so well, and intrigued as to what it was like to live in a "grass shack." I made lots of good friends, both "Black" and White." The school bullies stayed away from me, after my friends spread the word that I was an expert at Karate and Kung Fu. (They assumed my expertise in martial arts, because of all the movies they saw.)
Outside of school, I experienced some "name-calling" and other indications of prejudice. In most cases, the name-calling referred to me as coming from another Oriental culture. So I knew there was ignorance and a definite lack of knowledge.
When we returned to Hawaii a year later, I realized the positive impact my experience in Florida had on me. It not only changed my views on racial prejudice, it also encompassed much more. I approached all of my interactions and communication with others by asking myself one question: how would I feel if I were that person? "Putting yourself in the other person's shoes," is an old cliche, but it works. Whether it is with family, friends, or in business, it has always helped me to gain the respect of others, and thus build positive relationships. I also recognized that even in Hawaii, we had racial prejudice. Of course it was only a subtle comment, or action. But it certainly had the same negative impact.
My hope is that I can teach my children from my experience without having them feel the hurt that ignorance can bring. I hope they will always keep a child's view of people, looking beyond appearance. I hope they will always think of the other person before thinking of themselves. And though these hopes seem elusive, like our shadows, my parents, who must have experienced a deeper prejudice and ignorance, did not give up on the teachings and values they instilled in me.
"As one little candle lights another, so the light of Buddha's compassion will pass from one mind to another mind endlessly." - Shakyamuni Buddha